i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
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