I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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