my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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