everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
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