Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Randomize
