Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Randomize