I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
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