I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Randomize
