This girl is more easily done than said...
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize