For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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