: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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