i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
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