what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize
