Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
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