I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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