Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Randomize