so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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