There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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