he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
