Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Randomize
