My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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