Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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