Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
