that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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