i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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