Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
