Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
