I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Randomize
