sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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