before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
