Its about making memories worth repressing
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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