I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
