..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
