Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
