i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
