brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
