he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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