Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
