she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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