I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
