it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Randomize
