Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
