Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
My vagina just clenched in fear
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
