apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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