Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
