Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
