Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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