ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
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