Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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