is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Hippo gnu deer
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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