Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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