Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
It's like God shit irony all over that family
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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